"As Jesus went, the people pressed around him. And there was a woman who had had a discharge of blood for twelve years, and though she had spent all her living on physicians, she could not be healed by anyone" (Luke 8:40-43).
I can imagine her standing there. The crowds are pressing in, and yet she feels alone...unknown. Lost in a sea of people, and yet acutely aware of her own brokenness. Her body and her heart have bled for too many long months and years, making her unclean and unworthy of human touch. If only she could find the healing she had spent all her years and dollars trying to obtain, maybe then the shroud of shame that had become her garment would be lifted.
"She came up behind him and touched the fringe of his garment, and immediately her discharge of blood ceased" (Luke 8:44).
She wanted physical healing...and believed touching Jesus would be enough.
"And Jesus said, 'Who was it that touched me?' When all denied it, Peter said, 'Master, the crowds surround you and are pressing in on you!' But Jesus said, 'Someone touched me, for I perceive that power has gone out from me'" (Luke 8:45-46).
She wanted healing...and He wanted to know her. He was not afraid of her desire, of her bleeding or her femininity. He was not put off by her "dirtiness."
She was not hidden to Him.
"When the woman saw that she was not hidden, she came trembling, and falling down before him declared in the presence of all the people why she had touched him, and how she had been immediately healed" (Luke 8:47).
I would guess that she would have been content with the physical healing, but He knew she would not have been truly healed. He called her out, brought her to her knees.
Then He spoke life to her: "Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace" (Luke 8:48).
I imagine Jesus reaching out a hand and pulling her up from the ground, lifting her chin with a gentle finger. I imagine His eyes spoke the heart healing she did not even know she needed: "I see you; I know you. I am not disgusted by your bleeding body. I have known your bleeding heart...be known by me." She wanted to stop the bleeding, and she left with a heart freed in the knowing of a God-man who took on himself her bleeding body and bleeding soul.
I have been her...bleeding in my own shame and brokenness, alone and unknown. I have longed for the healing, and been caught in the knowing. How often do I ask for the fixing, rather than the knowing? This God, "who has searched me and knows me," is teaching me that the fixing comes through the knowing (Psalm 139:1). As I know and am deeply known by God, my bleeding heart is mended. The shame is lifted, and I am at peace.
Dear friend, know that you are not hidden to the God of the universe. You are known, and you are beckoned to know. Won't you allow yourself to be caught in the knowing today?
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